HELP! CHAOS has taken over my home!

Things are really, really bad at home right now. And when I say bad I mean really, really BAD! I don't know what to do anymore. I just feel like running out, lock the door and throw away the key.My home has been messy before but nowhere near the state it is in right now...

I don't even know where to be begin to tell you because every room in the house looks like a tornado just struck. I feel so worn out, I don't know how to even clean up the mess. But I do know why it's like this.

It's spring time. I need to get out the summer clothes and wash and go through the winter clothes. It's been raining for 4 days now so the laundry room is totally full of dirty laundry. It's getting up to my knees now. That's bad,very bad. I reckon I have like 12 loads thrown out all over the floor.It's not a pretty sight.

We've had a rough week. We have gotten home after 6 PM everyday this week and I have to be at work before 7 PM on Tuesdays and Thursdays so I just finished making dinner and left the kids eating while I was at work. And what happens when you leave 2 boys alone at home for about 2 hours? Oh yes, the house gets messy,very messy. There are toys, books, games and magazines all over the place. Add to the confusion a new job of mine which pretty much left me with no time whatsoever to pick things up and clean the mess.

Today I managed to get the drains in the bathroom clogged up so when I tried to fix it the tube just fell off and I got the bathroom flooded. It's still not completely fixed so I need to call a plumber tomorrow morning.

Aaaargh! Some one PLEEEEAAASE hand me a wand! I need to get this tidied up because tomorrow the TV repair man is coming over and I'm just too ashamed to have someone in the house. This is soooo embarrassing!

It's past 2 AM and I don't have the strength to do any more cleaning tonight. I need to get some sleep. I haven't hardly slept anything at all this week due to the storm and heavy raining. They say it's going to rain until Tuesday...

I'm not here ;-)

I'm not here actually, I'm studying like crazy. *lol* I have to send a paper about Spanish literature in the 15th century to my tutor before tomorrow night and I still haven't written a word. :-( I need to do a lot of research and my internet connexion is so lousy I just want to cry.... I've been trying for 5 days now to get on to the school's server but no way José. I need to download some texts, read them and make a resume but there's still no luck. I don't think I'll make it on time because if I was all alone I could stand a day without food and a night without sleep but I have to take care of the kids and they are almost bored to death at home. This is getting much harder than I ever thought it would be. But I'm not giving up! NEVER!

So, if you see me around here this weekend, please give me a hug and a friendly kick in my butt because I really HAVE TO READ several hundred pages instead of hanging around the internet...

See you on Monday after I've got a bit of sleep!

Spring clothes

Spring is in the air. Today is a fairly warm day, a little windy but the sun is warm. We are stuck indoors because the kids want to spend their last day of the holiday plugged in to the Play Station. Ok, so I let them. Am I a really lousy mom for not making them go outdoors in the sun? I don't think so... Because from tomorrow on they will be back in school and will spend at least a couple of hours outdoors each day. So why not let them decide? There will be lots of sunny days ahead, from May and onwards until October there will be hardly any rain at all so there will be plenty of tie to play in the sun.

I feel a bit stressed today. I guess that's just part of the PMS I'm suffering right now. :-( I've done quite a lot of laundry and in a few hours I have to go to work. I don't feel like working today. I guess we're been off school and work for too many days, I've just become a lazy Franny. Oh my! It's time to get back on the Fly Lady wagon again, I NEED it!

Over the next coming weeks I'll need to go through all our clothes. I will wash and stash away the winter clothes we might be able to wear next winter, give away what we will not wear again and throw away what's too torn to give away. I need a mayor make over of my closet. I'm so tired of my clothes! I think I'll be radical this year and get rid of all those items I keep, "just in case"... I've lost quite a bit of weight these past years and all my old jeans and sweaters are too big for me. I think it's time, once and for all, to get rid of my old big me and only keep what I wear right now. And if I gain weight again, well, then I'll just have to buy new clothes! A crammed closet doesn't make me a happier person...

So what's new in the fashion scene for spring? I'm sorry to admit that I haven't got a clue about fashion. I think I'd have to get addicted to a fashion blog so I'll learn. I want to be a posh mommy, not the usual Franny I'm at home. HELP! I guess I, too, need a makeover! So, where should I go first? Any suggestion will be very well appreciated, because I think this situation really has to change. Yep, I'm about to turn into a butterfly.... Or at least that's what I wish I could be....

Old and new

This is what my home town looks like nowadays. Old houses, almost destroyed by time and lack of care, side by side with supermodern blocks of flats. Most of the old houses, some of them with beautiful gardens, are gone by now. The whole town is changing and I'm not sure I like all the changes....

Happy easter!

Well, Lent is almost over for this year. Only two more days to go....

My experience this year has not been so good. I had so many plans for Lent this year, I would start praying every day, I would do my Rosary, I would read the Bible, I would stay away from internet, cookies and meat... Well, in the end I just managed to stay away from the internet (thanks to the internet provider that cut me off), meat (except for one day when I had to eat out and there was no non meat food on the menu) and cookies (except for a few days when I was on the edge of a total breakdown and needed a sugar rush). So in the end I guess I did okey. Not as good as I planned, but it could have been worse.

Life has been really chaotic lately. Lots and lots of problems and no solution not even close, so I feel really exhausted. I hope things will start to improve soon, because I'm really running on empty right now.

The kids and I plan to have a tiny party just for us on Sunday. I hope it will be fun, because we do need some family fun time to be able to go back to school and work again after over a week of vacation.How is it that I always feel more tired AFTER the holidays than BEFORE?

Anyway, have a great Easter!!! Don't eat too much candy and eggs. *lol*

Shopping in the medina

I went to the medina, the old town, one day and had my camera with me. Unfortunately the pictures didn't turn out so sharp but I hope you'll enjoy them anyway.

This is just a normal store, the Moroccan style. You can get just about everything in one place. We don't need any malls. *lol*

Gold, gold, gold... Lots of bling bling sold in this one.

And when it comes to bling bling, there's nothing better than a bridal store. Oh boy, you can get everything you've ever dreamt about and lots more.

The butcher. Seeing the meat like that makes me glad I hardly ever have to eat it...

A horrible weekend

Oh boy, am I glad it's Monday tomorrow? This has been an awful weekend. Living alone with a 10 year old tween and an 8 year old can be really tough sometimes.

My son B usually is the sweetest person on earth. He has some special needs, due to asphyxia at birth and ECMO. There are some things he can't handle very well, like being tired, being hungry and being in crowds. He doesn't know how to read the "unwritten rules" of society and can't stand stress and unplanned situations. He is very, very intelligent, actually he's highly gifted and much smarter than most kids his age. When there's a lot going on and he's tired and hungry at the same time things can get really bad. Friday was one of those days. He got into a frenetic state, started to throw things around, hitting his brother and me, he kicked me, spat at me, broke some of his toys, wrote things on the walls.... The only thing I could do was to throw myself on him, hold his arms and legs until he finally calmed down and fell asleep... It happened twice on Friday and once on Saturday. It left the three of us exhausted and I just had to take a nap today because of all the stress. It's been a horrible, horrible weekend.

Where's my inspiration?

I've taken the day off my studies today. The boys and I went to mass this morning, after having breakfast in a café with some friends. Unfortunately B got sick at church and threw up, several times. We had to run to the toilet so I missed the Eucharist. Poor thing, he was really pale afterwards but got well in no time, once outside the church...

Then when we got home G got really furious because I talked to him while he was playing Nintendo DS and started to scream like crazy so he's punished, no TV and Nintendo for a couple of days. B was tired and layed down for a while. I just gave up, there was no chance to study today. :-( So I cuddled up in bed instead and watched "The prisoner from Azkaban" on my laptop. And then I decided to make some cards... But no way, the inspiration is all gone.... I ended up cutting a lot of paper but didn't make a single card. They all look so UGLY and there's something missing...

I really wanted to make some cards and participate in Amy's Sunday scrapping this week but that seems imposible. :-(

Anyway, this is my To Do-list for the coming week:
* I want to make at least 10 cards

No ta da's this week...

And here's the bonus question: If you could only do one kind of paper crafts for the rest of your life, which craft would you pick?
Oh, that's a tricky one! Can I pick stamping, any kind of stamping? Then that would be my choice. I'm a stampaholic... All I need now is the inspiration....

The air quality

One thing we definitely don't need here right now is a humidifier, because the air is so humid these months of winter. It's not really that cold, seldom below 10 degrees Celsius during the day although temperatures do drop down to 3 - 4 degrees at night occasionally. Electricity is very expensive here so many people don't even use an electric heater. The only way to beat the high levels of humidity is to leave the windows open as much as you can. At night they cuddle up below several thick blankets and bedspreads. I think Morocco is one of the few countries in the world where you actually need more clothes indoors during winter than outdoors!

In countries where the climate is much colder than this, the air indoors sometimes gets too dry, due to continuous heating, to a limit when it can provoke nose bleeds, cracked lips and uncomfortable air quality. In order to avoid that problem an aprilaire humidifier is a good thing to have. The aprilaire humidifier is easy to install, you can probably install it yourself because all the instructions and How-To:s come with the appliance. I wish we could use continuous heating here, it's nice to live in a warm and cozy home. But electricity is too expensive so we just have to get used to the cold indoors and try to spend as much time as possible out in the sun.

Coffee and more coffee

I'm not really a coffee drinking girl, but when I meet my friends I somehow end up drinking a lot of coffee. I don't know why. Maybe because they drink a lot of coffee or maybe because going to a café without having coffee seems like a silly thing to do. Anyway, I had a lot of coffee during Christmas.



I had this great day when I met several of my dearest friends. First I met one of my best friends for coffee and breakfast at 10 AM in a café. It was so good to meet her again! C and I have been friends for almost 15 years. We met at work, when we both worked as interpreters at a refugee camp in Stockholm. And we've been through a lot since than. She came to visit me here in Morocco last summer and it was so good to show her the place where I live and what my life here is like. Unfortunately we could only spend 2 hours together, because I had to meet another friend at noon.

With friend number 2 I went to the big craft store (see a previous post) and then we went to another café to meet with a whole bunch of friends. What amazes me most about this group of friends is that we all met on the internet a few years back and now they are like sisters to me. I feel really close to them and I don't know what I would do without them. Isn't it amazing that you can meet someone on the internet and when you finally meet IRL it's like you've been friends forever?

I had more coffee during those 11 days in Stockholm than I normally have in like 2 months here. Maybe that's why I could study so well at night? I guess I'll have to take up the coffee drinking habit again. When I studied at the university in Spain I always had a coffee every morning and then several more each day. Maybe I don't need to drink that much coffee, since it's not good for the stomach, but at least a cup a day might help me keep my head clear. I think I'll go and buy some coffee tomorrow and try it out for a while.

What kind of flower....

I am a Daffodil What Flower Are You?

You have a sunny disposition and are normally one of the first to show up for the party. You don't need too much attention from the host once you get there as you are more than capable of making yourself seen and heard.

I think this quiz is quite cute. It reminds me of spring. How I long to spring! I hate when it's cold and dark and rainy....Today the weather is really, really nice. It's cold but the air is crisp and the sun is shining from a blue sky. I've had the windows open for the whole day, because this time of year you really need to do that as much as possible or the damp will get stuck in the walls.

Well, it's time to log out and get something done at home before I rush into town to get my boys. It'll be interesting to hear what they have to say about school today since it's their first day after the holidays. And my first day of studying at home. and what do I do? i blog, surf the net and visit all my favorite places... Shame on me! But honestly, I really needed a bit of time off my studies. I feel refreshed, updated and full of energy. Now I can be a good mommy again. :-)

Exams!

Now it's official, the list with the dates and hours for the exams. I will have an exam a day between January 21 and January 25. Woohooo!!! An exam a day, I will become a nervous wreck.:-(

Oh well, I'd better get back to packing. We're leaving on Wednesday morning and I haven't even started packing yet...

More photos

This shot is from the same street as my previous post. If you look closely you can actually see the shop.

There were some questions about the shop so I'd better explain a little bit. Shops in Morocco are called "hanut". Most of the time the shop is so small you can't even go inside, it's often just a few square meters. The shop keeper sits on a chair inside, sometimes behind a counter, sometimes there isn't even room for a counter. There are things EVERYWHERE, stacked from floor to ceiling. In the same shop you can often buy bread, butter, cheese, detergent, bleach, umbrellas, cigarettes, lemonade, juice, flour, milk, egg, toilet paper, shampoo, candy, canned food, lighters, baby wipes and LOTS, LOTS more. They usually open around 10 AM, close by 1.30 PM and then open around 5.30 PM and close after 10 PM. Some shops don't close until 2 AM.

There are shops like this everywhere. The shop keeper knows everyone in the neighborhood so he sells whatever he knows the people want to buy. *lol* Some of them even change money (after all, we live close to the border), help you with paper work and are a helping hand in general. And if you don't have enough money oe day to pay for what you buy, no problem. You can pay another day. My life definitely would be a lot harder without our local shop, that's for sure.

And then there were two...

... sick kids at home. Oh no, how am I going to study with 2 kids at home? The "Mama, I'm thirsty!","Mama, I'm cold", "Mama, I'm bored. Play with me" will be double. I don't know how I'm going to manage. My To Do List for today is very long and I get the impression that I'm not going to finish... And I HAVE TO finish an exam I have to deliver by Wednesday, printed and ready.

Or maybe they will keep each other company and won't spend the whole day arguing, so there's a slight chance I get a few hours of peaceful study time. I hope so, because I'm still behind schedule and the exams are around the corner. This year I'm not really enjoying Christmas, I don't know where my Christmas spirit is... I hope it will appear as soon as I deliver the exam and can start to think about other things as well. At least I've begun to decorate the house a little bit. Not much and not enough, but at least you can see that Christmas is celebrated in this house. *lol*

Oh no...

Now it's B:s turn to be sick. Is this never going to stop? Can I make it through without getting sick? What happens if I get sick too? No, that's not posible because if I do, who's going to look after us?

G has been sick on and off for over a week now. First he stayed home from school last Friday because he had fever and he was quite ill. Then on Saturday morning he was okey but Saturday night he had fever again. He was feeling really bad Sunday morning (so no church :-() and then on Sunday night he was okey. I wanted him to stay at home on Monday but he refused to, he had an exam and he wanted to do it. So I let him go to school Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday. When I went to pick them up at school he had fever again and when we came home it was 39 degrees Celsius. :-( He has been in bed for the most part since then. Today he seems to be fine.

Last night B:s temperature started to rise and right now it's 38,5. He's in bed, but his brother doesn't let him rest. When G was sick, B spent most of the time in his room, playing and reading, but G just can't be alone. He has to stay close to his brother all the time, so when B:s sick he doesn't get the rest he deserves unless I spend a lot of time entertaining G. I hope B will be fine in a few days time and that I can resist the virus, because there's no way I can be sick right now.

Love is in the air

Several of my friends are divorced. They met husband number 1 when they were young, got married, had kids, bought a house, a car, went on vacations... And then one day they realized that the person they were married to no longer was the same, just like they are not the same anymore. People change over the years, as you live new experiences, meet new people, see new places...

Getting over a break up can be very hard sometimes. It's a process that can take months or years to accomplish. Having friends and family who support you and stand by your side is very helpful. As a friend you don't have to do anything really, just being there and taking the time to listen and lending a shoulder a cry on is enough in most cases.

Some of my friends have found a new love, some are still looking. It's nice to see my friends so happy and crazy in love. They really deserve to be happy. Some of them have gone through a lot to get where they are now (abusive husbands, domestic violence, etc) and finding that special person has made up for all the bad things they have experienced. We all need a bit of romance in our lives! Even when you're happily married and have no plans whatsoever to get a divorce.

It's Friday!

Thank God it's Friday! Or maybe not... I have 2 exams I have to finish before Sunday and I'm only halfway through so in a way I don't like it being Friday today.

I feel a little bit of stress. Especially since my youngest DS is home from school today. He has a bit of fever and tummy ache, so I decided he'd stay at home. People here usually send their kids to school, even when they are sick. They just give them medicine and off to school! I couldn't do that... I don't know, I think that's wrong. A sick child should be at home in bed with his/her mommy or somebody else who can take care of him/her. That's my opinion. What's yours? When do you send your kids to school/kindergarden? Is a little bit of temperature enough to let them stay at home? Red eyes, throwing up, tummy ache, pain in an ear...? Is it okey to give the kids medicine so they can go to school? G sleeps on the couch right now, he really must be sick! *lol* Usually he's up and about even when he has a very high temperature. I'm glad he's at home so I can keep an eye on him.

I work today. With a new group. It's the last group I can take this year, because I need to have some time for me and my studies as well as with my kids. I really love my job, teaching is so much fun! But they pay me very little, so I'm definitely not going to be rich. I don't care much about money but of course it would be nice to earn enough to be able to do something fun with the kids. Oh well, that's the downside of being a volunteer teacher. So far I haven't finished preparing the class so I'll have to do that in a little while.

I'll try to finish the living room today, for the challenge. I'm not sure I'm going to make it, because with G sick at home I don't think there will be such a lot of time to clean. :-( Anyway, I'll post the pictures in a few hours.

I still haven thought about what we're having for dinner. :-( I think we'll have mashed potatoes and sausages for lunch. What are you having for dinner tonight?

Trapped at work

It's still raining... It has been raining for several days now. And the sky is grey and cloudy so I guess it won't stop raining today. So unfortunately, no church today. It's raining too hard, I've never seen rains anywhere like these here in Morocco.

Yesterday we went to my job to have lunch. Yes, we do that sometimes. Someone decides to make lunch for the rest of the bunch and everyone brings what he/she can (bread, fruit, Coke, juice, cookies, salad, whatever...). It's really nice. Not so much for the food as for the getting together with friends and have a good time. Yesterday one of the guys from Peru made paella. I LOVE paella!



Afterwards we just had to stay, because it was raining so hard that you just couldn't get out. We live just a few minutes from my job, I can actually see it from my house, but no way. We were "trapped". It was an odd feeling, but we had a great time. I did manage to study a little and help a friend of mine prepare for an exam, so I felt really good.

But today I have to finish a paper on Arcipreste de Hita, and it's taking me forever...

Too much noise

It's hard to study with the kids at home. Even when I go into another room I can still hear them and that makes it hard to concentrate on what I'm reading. My house is still suffering from the makeover so at the moment we only have one table where I can sit down and work, and that's the dining table, in the middle of the apartment. Surrounded by toys, TV and kids... I think I need ear plugs. There are actually ear plugs made especially for students!

Even when I study in the library at work I get distracted. There's so much noise everywhere. And I'm getting worn out by studying at night, because I don't get enough sleep. I really, really need to get back on track and learn how to study at home. I know what I need to do - get my home back in shape, buy the furniture we so badly need, get some ear plugs, a lamp for the living room and most important, get organized. I have my books all over the place, because I don't have a desk or drawer or even a shelf to put them on, so I leave them wherever I can. I might not pass all my exams in January, I accept that, because things have not been going my way lately, but I will do my best. Out of 5 classes I hope to pass at least 3 of them. Right now I feel like I won't pass a single one, I don't feel prepared at all, but I'll study like crazy all Christmas and we'll see what I can come up with. I'm still very much in the game.

The rain is pouring down

I'm glad my pantry is full of food, because it hasn't stopped raining for 2 days now. I went down to the local "hanut", shop, a little while ago and one neighbor told me he heard on the news that it will be raining until Sunday. Oh my, that's a long time.... The rainy season really made a boom this year.